Shetan & our Nerves

Something just made me wonder that y is shetan so dominant over us? Y does he have so strong grip over our nerves and our decision making powers?  y cant we at times or may be always just by pass this shetan’s  misguidance and go to the right path.

Knowing the fact that what we have in our mind or the decision that we are going to make has both the right and the wrong faces to it, we still fall pray to his misguidance and choose to walk over the wrong path? Y is sin that ecstatic that it even makes us to forget the right paths defined by Allah who actually loves us even more than 70 mothers altogether. Y not that kindness,  uncountable blessings of Allah over powers our nerves when we are about to make the decision and stop us from going towards the wrong.

Even having this in our minds that going for the wrong path does have disadvantages in the long run for us but still just for that temporary pleasure and delight we tend to decide for it. Y do we take HIS love for granted, y doesn’t His uncountable grace and divine sanctions stop us from being unreasonable and look for sins willingly, y God himself has made the shetan so powerful and not our nerves that strong to fight against the evil thoughts and make him loose in front of the LOVE of All Mighty?or its the other way round,its us who dont know how to fight for the right cause????

Or is shetan that very strong or we are too weak to fight against him?

 

Enough Already!

Enough  Enough  Enough Enough Enough!!!

Firstly its just like a minute dot on the canvas that says “enough”, then by the time it keeps growing and growing and it appears exacty as loud as they appear above. Its like an empty cylinder that keeps filling in and then in the end this large enough comes out of it as there is not sufficient space in it. I want to say it as the judge in any court room says “order order order” when some chaos goes on in the court room. I want to say it with burning eyes like coal so that the person whom it is intended for should know the intensity hidden behind these words. The growl  in the voice would make the person shiver and should know what enough means. No explanations, no clarifications, no justifications, no reasons should be required to explain what this ENOUGH means. Just the word itself should be so powerful to put the meaning across.

 

HUM Lerkian!

I had been observing something and feeling it touch my heart for quite a few days. I had been upto noticing and taking a deeper look at the life style and the daily routines of the women around me….not exactly around me but the women in general may be.

Be it a 5 year old baby , or a 10 year old girl, or a 15 year old teenager, or a 25 year old student, or a 32 year old wife, or a 40 year old widow, pr a 35 year old single woman, or a 29 year old divorcee, or a 50 year old mother or a 70 year old grand mother…….aaaalllll these women are just up to one thing, apart from the differences they have there is just one thing they all practice and either happily or half heartedly they have to do it. either they are from the different walks of life, different professions,different society status,different religions,different countries….they all are busy making people happy around themselves.

Not caring much for themselves,they just keep on going on and on and on to satisfy people, to ease them,to bring the best to them, to make the most out of everything to please every body around them, going beyond limits, going beyond their own berdasht and capabilities…..they all run in a circle of rejoicing people.

Is that what all women are for?and do they really get in return what they deserve?the appreciation, the acknowledgment, the love, the care, the time, the attention they deserve…do they really get all that….or at the end of every effort they always receive a pile of disagreements, abusive words, lack of attention, all sorts of heart breaking behaviors.

i dont understand that why are’nt women careless about all these things,why do they kep track of all the minutest details even if she knows what -ve reaction she ll get in return?. why dont they just be their own selves and donot kill their own wishes and desires for others sake.

I myself lie in the above stated category of women and probably i find myself helpless in becoming the opposite to the women  stated above.i dont have any suitable words to end this post.so i am leaving it incomplete sans conclusion.

 

Forget about & To be?????

Is it too much to ask for what actually i am thinking about?or would i be at fault if i wish so?….questioning myself about these two things the answers i got were YES! its too much to ask for in my case,as the situation and the circumstances i am in it ll be inequitable to think so.

The thing i am talking about is just for once or once in a while i want to be MYSELF,to be on MY OWN,to be what i USED to be,to execute things MY WAY,to act upon MY OWN WILL,see and perceive things just keeping MYSELF in mind.

I just want to forget about everything else thats going on around me,forget about people,forget about the weather,forget about those various worries and tensions,forget about house hold operations,forget about getting up early in the morning,forget about making break fast for some one else,forget about ironing & washing clothes,forget about kitchen,forget about getting back to home within the time limits,forget about the jitters that i experience when getting late,forget about going to mum’s place just for helping her to execute a dawat (family party) well,forget to worry about mum that how will she manage all those chores now when i am not around,forget this that what ever i am doing i am being watched,forget about dusting and cleaning,forget about the restricted sleeping hours & forget about everything that makes me feel being restricted & that makes me run in a certain kind of day to day routine.

I want to set myself free as i previously was,sleep and eat and drink and read and surf and walk and dance and watch tv and shop and laugh and see frends and dine out and cook and clean and wash and dust off and assemble things and watch the rain silently with no one at all around me and lie in bed aimlessly staring the ceiling and endlessly talk on the fone and beautify myself and love and meet people and express and write and sing and visit loved ones and everything else that one can do or i used to do…i want all that to be done the way i want to do it. just for once i want all these things not to be dependent on any other xyz tasks,or ant other xyz operation or person to influence any of my actions.

Am i really asking for much?cant really decide……a thought says that YES! m asking for much as dats all not possible now.i gota reevaluate things and form neew priorities and fix my likes and dislikes according to them.i cant be MYSELF anymore.

 

Tag TAg TAG!!!!

Hmm so just for the sake of getting used to blogging,i took this tag from http://harini.me and trying to attempt it.

Ten how’s:

1. How did you get one of your scars?

Surprisingly i DONT have any scars.

2.  How did you celebrate your last birthday? dint celebrate AT ALL.

3.  How are you feeling at this moment? i am feeling bored and as im fasting right now so m feeling lazy at the same time too.

4.  How did your night go last night?

Absolutely great,visited my dadi’s place,was invited for ifter. Met all the cousins and aunts and uncles.

5. How did you do in high school? I passed with flying colors.

6. How did you get the shirt you’re wearing? A gift from my cousin.

7. How often do you see your best friend(s)? Very often.

8. How much money did you spend last month? 4k.

9. How old do you want to be when you get married? Iwas 23 when i got married.

10. How old will you be at your next birthday? I dont look forwrd to my birthdays,they generally are sad for me for no particular reason.

Nine what’s:

1. Your mothers name? Nur Jehan

2. What did you do last weekend? Mostly stayed home and visited a cousin for dinner.

3. What is the most important part of your life? Family and Friends. And also love and happiness.

4. What would you rather be doing? lying in bed and trying to take a nap.

5. What did you last cry over? i felt guilty coz i talked to my mom in a loud or a bit rude tone.

6. What always makes you feel better when you’re upset? Talking to any of my best friends.

7. What’s the most important thing you look for in a significant other? Has to be Honest and Decent.

8. What are you worried about? Nothing Alhum do lillah.

9. What did you have for breakfast? Had kebab paratha for sehri,

Eight you’s:

1. Have you ever liked someone who had a girlfriend/boyfriend? None.

2. Have you ever had your heartbroken? No… I ve never been to hell:)

3. Have you ever been out of the country? Yes.

4. Have you ever done something outrageously dumb? Ofcourse!!!

5. Have you ever been back stabbed by a friend? Yes.

6. Have you ever had sex on the beach? NO

7. Have you ever dated someone younger than you? NO

8. Have you ever read an entire book in one day? NO

Seven who’s:

1. Who was the last person you saw? MIL.

2. Who was the last person you texted? Hubby Dear.

3. Who was the last person you hung out with? Hubby Dear.

4. Who was the last person to call you? Ufone Help;)

5. Who did you last hug? Mum.

6. Who is the last person who texted you? Hubby Dear.

7. Who was the last person you said “I love you” to? Hubby Dear.

Six where’s:

1. Where does your best friend(s) live? A place in karachi city where i wish to have my own house one day.

2. Where did you last go? Dadi’s place.

3. Where did you last hang out? Pizza hutt.

4. Where do you go to school? Karachi.

5. Where is your favorite place to be?

6. Where did you sleep last night? On my bed.

Five do’s:

1. Do you think anyone likes you? Ya

2. Do you ever wish you were someone else? Not really,i am happy with the way im.

3. Do you know the muffin man? No.

4. Does the future scare you? NO.

5. Do your parents know about your blog? NO.

Four why’s:

1. Why are you best friends with your best friend? coz they are an essential part of my life,i cant breath with out them.

2. Why did you get into Blogging? Jus wanted to see how it works and secondly i found an outlet to write the TALES LESS TOLD.

3. Why did your parents give you the name you have? dont know,rather my dadi named me.

4. Why are you doing this survey? IJus to pass my time.

Three if’s:

1. If you could have one super power what would it be? To get invisible when ever i want to.

2. If you could go back in time and change one thing, would you? No coz everything went so perfect Alhum do lillah and it was all in my favor toh i wont like to change ant thing at all.

3. If you were stranded on a deserted island and could bring 1 thing, what would you bring? My best Friend or food may be.

Two would-you-ever’s:

1. Would you ever get back together with any of your ex’s if they asked you? Nvere.Gone is gone for me.

2. Would you ever shave your head to save someone you love? Yes..everything is fair in love and war.

One last question:

1. Are you happy with your life right now? Very Very much Alhum do lillah.

 

Questions Questions & Questions

Wish i cud be this blunt & uncourteous to say “plzzzzzzzzzzzzz mind ur own business,thats NON of your concernnnnnnnnnnnnnn”….i mean why on earth every XYZ is so concerned about it, isnt it supposed to be MY personal matter,whyy are they getting worried and taking tensions about it. i seriously DONT need your advices and suggestions,seriously i DONOT.

Aint i educated or capable enough to deal with all those matters on my own. Its ohkay if you show your “tender loving care” for once only but why repeating it all the time during every meeting and that also in front of very irrelevant people.

That is all my head ache if or not i consult any doctor for my incapability of getting pregnant, why every tom dick and harry on the roads find it as their obligation to comment about it or give endless lessons and prescriptions to go to this clinic and consult that doctor.

At some point i find it fine if any of my dear ones as in some one like my mother or sisters in law propose me to do that, because they are the close ones and they have the right. And i dont even mind it if they suggest so. But hearing it from the least concerned party it irritates me more than it hurts me.

i am seriously sick of it all and now i some times find myself on the verge of being impolite with people whose advice is least welcomed by me, i feel like just very straight forwardly saying right in their faces that PLZ MIND YOUR OWN BUSSINESSSSSSSS,i dont need any free free free guidance.

 

Respect the green and love the white

Lahoo mein doob rahi hai fiza-e- arze watan,

Mein kis zuban se kahon Jashn-e- azadi mubarak ho

People say we need to keep our hopes high,and pray. But what i say is that keeping only our HOPES high wont do any good to the country,its about time that we should DO something,its time to materialize our hopes and ideas rather than just keeping our hopes high and doing nothing but watching them rob and kill us.

Its time to get united and work against all those odds. We need to come out of our comfortable cozy houses and REALIZE that its time to pay back, its time to strive harder in order to make this country what it was really built for.

Yes, Pakistan isn’t perfect. Yes, Pakistan has been looked down upon by each and every country out there. And Yes, we still have a long way to go. However, that doesn’t change the fact that we’re still Proud Pakistanis.

The fact is that ‘we are … if Pakistan is” and we’re damn proud of what all our nation has achieved in the last sixty-three years so “Shukriya, Pakistan”!

 

Fl.Lt Sana Aslam

“Badal ko choonay ki chahat toh thi.urnay ka armaan nahin tha mager,dedia mujh ko aik ajnabi aasman,mere peron se meri zameen cheen ker….”

dis is all i can relate to these days…..

 

Ruined

Happiness seems like an enemy to me.every time i feel a bit happy and gay the situations snatch it away from me nd im left empty handed,m confused wat to do to fix this permanent trouble in my life,its goin on nd on nd on.its now hard for me to be patient and bear it nymore.i pray alot,i really pray hard to make it better for me but all in vain.i find no ways ahead,no path defined,no light in the tunnel,m jus walking blindly along the road with out emotions becoz this is the way im supposed to act,i cant act the other way.m bound to stay in this torture cell 24/7.
y do u do so?yyyyyyyyyyyyy?y do u ruin my smile,my plans,my peace?
u dont know how dead observant i am,nd i catch it all before even u execute it.stop it plz stop it,it comes to me as intense pain and grief.i mite not be able to bear it any longer.
i want the right path BUT from where?

 

u make me smile, u make me cry….

The realization disappoints me,hits me hard nd takes my smile away every now and then…..